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Ordinary People. Ordinary Things. with Melissa Radke

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What to Do When He's No Fun and Divorce is Expensive

Mar 6, 2018

David Radke, the Attorney General himself, is my guest today. He is the man behind all of the overdraft fees from our first year of marriage. He is my husband Mr. David Radke. I want you to meet the man who makes sure that I wear pants when recording this podcast. We have been married 23 years and 16 of those have been really awesome.

David and I share part of our story of when we first got together. This story is kind of a cliffhanger, because I'm going to make you attend one of my events to hear the hilarious ending. We also talk about marriage clichés that just aren't true. David talks about the importance of communication and how having a successful marriage is a choice.

You can find Melissa and David here:

Podcast Web Page
Facebook Page
@MsMelissaRadke on Instagram
@msmelissaradke on Twitter

Show Notes

  • [01:34] 25 years ago, David asked Melissa if he could hold her hand.
  • [03:08] The story of how David and Melissa got together. They met in their first year of college. They were in a group that traveled and sang together, and they became best friends.
  • [03:44] Over time, David knew there was something more there.
  • [04:12] The night David decided to tell Melissa that he wanted to be more than friends, his current girlfriend just happened to be out of town.
  • [04:56] The reason Melissa opens a lot of her engagements with this story and why it's an entire chapter in her book is because David's girlfriend or ex-girlfriend was an adorable cheerleader.
  • [05:35] Melissa always wanted to be a cheerleader, but she can't jump.
  • [05:49] When Melissa went back to her dorm room to get ready for her date with David, the former girlfriend and the entire cheerleading squad was waiting for her. They wanted her to either cancel the date or to record it.
  • [06:41] Melissa put a Sony Walkman in her purse and hit record when David came to pick her up.
  • [07:01] Melissa actually got David on tape talking about how amazing his ex-girlfriend cheerleader's car was.
  • [07:38] He kept talking about the car, but Melissa couldn't hit stop on the recorder or else he would know. Then he wined and dined her at Macaroni Grill.
  • [08:39] David was Melissa's best friend but she wasn't thinking about love at that point in her heart. She was actually thinking that she just beat a cheerleader.
  • [09:17] When Melissa got back to her room, the cheerleader ex-girlfriend was sitting there waiting for her.
  • [09:45] The end of the story is actually better than the beginning of the story. But I'm not going to tell it you here. You're going to have to listen to me speak live to hear the ending of the story.
  • [10:28] David is this first guest on the second show because he is such a common reference in Melissa's life.
  • [11:53] David got the nickname the Attorney General after playing a game of Mexican train dominoes with Melissa's family. He started reading the rules to everyone after the game rules were changing during play.
  • [13:54] Melissa's new book is coming out it's called Eat Cake. Be Brave.
  • [16:18] Our marriage is ordinary in the most beautiful sense of the word. How do ordinary marriages stand the test of time?
  • [17:00] How do we keep a marriage a living, breathing, and ever-expanding thing?
  • [17:41] Communication and communicating how you feel for each other on those great days and on those days when things are not so fun.
  • [18:00] It's also important to communicate our expectations. Without me articulating those thoughts to you there is no way for you to know.
  • [18:31] Marriage clichés. Put a jelly bean in a jar for every time you have sex. Never go to bed angry.
  • [19:36] The reality is sometimes you might go to bed angry.
  • [19:54] Marriage counselors can help you work through many things. They helped us off and on over the years.
  • [21:05] Sometimes the most important communication you can have with your spouse is the really really hard stuff.
  • [22:15] Two humans trying to make it work comes with lumps and bumps and bruises.
  • [22:55] Choosing to love each other. I choose to come home to you tonight.
  • [24:55] There isn't one marital problem that we haven't faced.
  • [25:57] The snapshots I have of you David Radke are in my head, and are of you when you are at your most vulnerable.
  • [26:55] I'll never forget the picture of you in my head when you were crying when we were faced with losing a child.
  • [27:37] I also have a snapshot in my head of you in Maui when we were getting our vows renewed.

Thanks for joining us on Ordinary People Ordinary Things. Be sure to subscribe to our podcast on iTunes and leave a nice review. Just like your mother taught you.

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